Friday, May 11, 2012

Friday Confessional

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It is that time of week for confessions.  Come join at Mamarazzi's site.

I confess…


I am at the end of my ropes with one of my boys right now. I hate this! I seriously hate this! I keep telling myself I am a good Mom and feel guilty for what I am about to do, but I have to do this.

I confess…

I realize as an adult child, one is going to make mistakes. LEARN from them, this is part of life, do NOT continue to think you can do whatever you want without consequences. You were brought up not in this fashion, just because one turns 18 does NOT mean you can do whatever it is you want on your own time at your own pace.

I confess…

I think it is harder to be a parent of a young adult. I would take the terrible twos and tyrant threes (I think 3 is worse then 2) any day, any minute. They still are snugly and show their love. The year of 13 is tough, dealing with junior high and hormones. It brings out the alien in any child. Senior year, this year is bad and just the beginning of the young adult years.

I confess…

I should be sad (yet excited for him to start a new chapter in his life) right now, with my son moving out tomorrow morning. He will be gone all summer arriving back August 20 and into his own apartment. I should feel like I am going to miss him, but I DON’T!!! I just want this over with and I am not excited one bit. The oldest did this to me as well and then chose not to talk to any of us for 2 years because of a relationship he was in not because of what the second one has chosen.

I confess…

This time it will be different. It may be my choice not to talk to him; this is where the guilt is coming in. I have been battling with him. He lies to me so often. He has wrecked my car on more than one occasion, only telling me about the first. The other two I found on my own. No point of confronting him about it because he will only lie to my face about it. I have been battling him with his bedroom. It is a mess, honestly beyond a mess. It has been a mess for nearly a year. I think his room was only clean for maybe 3 days in a year. Here is the big problem. He needs to pack his stuff and move them to our spare room downstairs because another brother will be moving into this room the day he moves.

I confess…

He has only 3 boxes packed and 1 garbage bag packed. NOTHING out of his room. The room is a mess. He keeps telling me he will do it tomorrow or this day, yet tomorrow or this day never comes. This is starting to cause some tension with my husband and me as well. He keeps telling me to say something. I AM saying something, trust me I am more than saying by now. I am yelling. I do not like hearing what my husband wants for his consequences. This is not the first child to move out and leave a mess. They all have left behind crap. They all have moved in and out more than once leaving a mess and this kid has helped me clean up or did it his self to move into that room. I agree we need to draw a line but it needs to be with all of them.
I confess…

What I plan to do is this if he leaves it; I will toss it in a bag, if it breaks not my problem. I am tossing up the idea of calling his father and asking if I can bring his stuff there and have it stored. I also plan to tell this kid, that I am done. I will not carry through and assist him with a bed for his new place, and he has 1 month to get his own cell phone plan. He keeps saying he is an adult and can do what he wants, and then he can be an adult. I plan to tell him I am not happy with the road he has chosen. He is turning out just like his dad, thinking lying is acceptable and to treat loved ones terrible and do what ever it is he wants to without thinking of loved once is acceptable. I also am going to tell him I am not going to assist him not because of the first reasons I listed but because he has chosen that partying (drinking and doing drugs) are more important than simply showing family members respect. I am NOT okay with this at all, nor will I support him while he lives this life style. When he realizes what family means and grows up and wants a family, he knows where I am. He will be offered to come back home if needed only if he is clean. He will have to agree with random drug testing and if it is dirty he is not allowed to stay. I will not live with a user, not one more day.

I confess…

This is really killing me inside. I am a MESS!!! Oh, and this move he is doing on Saturday, he can not delay leaving, I can not say you can not leave at 7 am as planned because he is leaving with a group of 8 kids all following one another in their own cars driving to Nashville, then to New York to sale books door to door. He plans on going out tonight and partying with friends, sacrificing sleep to be with them since they are coming home for the summer. He thinks sacrificing sleep is perfectly fine because it is JUST highway driving. I told him I think this is one of the stupidest things I have ever heard from him and this is proof, drugs make you stupid. SERIOUSLY…I AM A MESS!!!!

I still think Family is everything...they are just messy sometimes.
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1 comment:

  1. i think that teenagers turn into little butt munches so we won't miss them so much when they love out. consider it a tender mercy. (:

    i think you are a great mom...a mom who didn't let this bother her would not be. your kid knows better because you have taught him better...one day all of that will kick in.

    good for you for letting him make his mistakes, he will learn from them...eventually.

    thanks for linking up, have a wonderful Mother's day!!

    ReplyDelete

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