Friday, July 12, 2013

Friday Confessional

It was Friday yesterday, You all know what that means?  Yep you guessed it, time to fess up.  Come join the fun over at Aubrey's High-Heeled Love.  She host this little party every Friday.
Here is what I am confessing this week.

I confess...

I am glad this is not a HAPPY list because I am not feeling very happy today.  I have been fighting sinus infection for two weeks now.

I confess...

I did not finish any of the three books I have been reading.  Maybe I should be smart and just read one at a time.  Next week Ricki Jill I promise I will have a post for Literary Friday.

I confess...

I am glad I have today off.  I did not sleep well at all.  I woke up several times crying softly in order not to wake my husband.  If we did not have a hotel room waiting for us, I would have driven two hours to spend the day with my Dad.

I confess...

We still have not made reservations in South Dakota yet for our vacation and it is driving me nuts.  We leave in ten days and we do not have everything planned yet.  I feel so unorganized with this vacation.

I confess...

I do not question WHY to God but I do not understand God at times.  I know he has a plan for everything.  He does not plan bad things but I know he will end up with a plan for it somehow.  What I do not understand is how come my niece continues with the life she has and my father's health.  I am grateful God has given me a chance to have my Dad back in my life.  I am grateful God has softened my heart to forgive my father before he came down with the cancer.  I just do not understand how come it was only a short time.

I confess...

I know some of the time wasted was my own fault, fear he would go back to the old way and did not really change.  I wasted a year and a half on my own.  The past two years with his cancer, I know I could have seen him more too.  I have this issue of watching loved ones die.  It is like if I do not see it, it will not happen.  I do not want to remember the end as unhealthy.  WHO am I fooling????  I should have went to Des Moines every month to spend more time with him, so the boys can be with him more while he still is not in pain.  Part of the reason I do not go is the cost of gas and now the pay cut.  I am sure Todd will assist if I ask.

I confess...

Trips to Des Moines will be monthly or every other week if I can swing it.  Especially now that his liver is full of cancer and it being so close to the blood vessels.  He is amazing the doctors, he has out lived what they thought.  He always gives God thanks for that.  He also tells them each time they have given him only 6 months, that he is not leaving until the good Lord says it is time.  Thanks for letting him know when they think it will be.  He has the right mind set.  I can not question God why.  I just do not understand his plans.

What are you confessing this week?

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5 comments:

  1. Jolene, it sounds like you are going through some very trying times. Having gone through some of my own in the past few years, I relate to you asking WHY and wondering how God's plan will all work out... Some days, I don't know if I'll ever have the answers, but I just have to trust & have faith.

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  2. Sinus infections are never fun. Hope you feel better soon.

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  3. Not planning a vacation less than 10 days out and I would be going nuts too! I'm learning to let go a little more...live off the cuff. My husband and his free spirit has been good for me. Or at least that's what I tell myself.

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  4. I know what you mean about questioning God, but I don't think it's bad to ask for answers.

    I just sent you an email....my sinuses have been on fire today!

    Sending you prayers, my friend. You've been on my mind today!

    {{{{{hugs}}}}},
    RJ

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  5. I'll be praying for you and your family.. Hugs from Idaho and no matter how unprepared for your vacation you may feel you are just go and enjoy it. You most definitely deserve it. :)

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