Monday, July 15, 2013

My Boy!


My oldest Matthew, I am so proud of him.  Do not take me wrong, I am proud of each one of my boys and the girls, but Matthew, right now he makes my heart shine with pride.  I am so happy the values I taught him he actually applies.  I am so proud to be his Mom.  Meet Matthew and his girlfriend who I simply adore Hannah.


Matthew has always been a good boy, except for a few years.  During some of my dark days, this young man, kid then, grew up way too fast.  They were during some of my dark days.  He became very protective of his brothers, he always was, but he made his self the father role in 8th grade, truthfully before more like 6th grade while I was at work but I never knew.  I left their father a couple of years sooner than I had planned to save Matthew.  I never realized my ex, their father, was abusing him too.  It was either I stayed with my original plan and be better financially and lose Matthew to drugs or suicide or leave their father and be financially devastated.  It was not a hard decision at all.  It was not easy on any of the boys, but Matthew had anger issues.  This is when he turned away from God.  He felt there is no God since God did not answer his prayers to change his father.  He went through counseling and if my move to Iowa City did not occur I think I still would have lost Matthew.  It was not easy him being so close to his father.  The move to Iowa City was exactly what he needed as well as for me and the other boys.  I had so many people judge me for picking my boys up and moving to Iowa City after only knowing Todd for four months but I knew in my heart and God showed so many signs it was the right thing to do. 

The past few years has been rough on Matthew. He experienced a rough break up with a girl he had been with for four years.  Financially it was a struggle for him to go to school once he transferred from Kirkwood Community College to the University of Iowa.  He was in the honor society at both schools.  Towards the end of each semester when he should have only been concentrating on finals, he also worried if he was going to be able to go back the next semester.  This went on for nearly two years.  Matthew began to drink a lot.  I was so worried about him.  I know many children young adults go through this but with my father being an alcoholic I worried.  He started to work at Jimmy John's after my sister Amy referred him.  He moved up quickly and had to drop out of college due to lack of money.  Unfortunately, I was not in a position to assist him any.  Last fall he met Hannah.  I adore this girl.  She is so good for Matthew.  In December last year, he was promoted to Assistant General Manager and when you take this position with the company you have to give a year commitment is what we thought but found out just recently it is two years.  He works hard during the school year he works 67-72 hours a week.  Hannah keeps reminding him it is for school.  In September he will become the General Manager.  At the age of 23 my son will be the General Manager and this will look great on his resume.  After he completes his two years he will be able to finish his last year and a half of college without taking any more loans and all of the loans he previously took will be paid in full.  This is such a heavy loaded that has been removed from me.

I love Sunday's when I get to see him and Hannah.  Last night I was thrown for a loop.  Hannah told me she has a brain tumor.  She found out in February.  I think she told me because she is becoming more comfortable with me and because she is starting a new chemo treatment, her third round.  This time she may or may not lose some hair.  She told me it is a curable type and I pray for her everything goes well.  She told me how much Matthew has supported her.  He will stay up late and help her study for test because the tumor makes her forget what she just learned and Matthew will help her and re-teach her.  She is a Bio-Chemist major and Matthew was a Chemical Engineer major. They have so much in common.  I am truly amazed how well Matthew is handling things.  He is her positive ground support as she is for him.  I pray with all my heart she comes through this because I do care for her and because Matthew would be lost without her.  If it is God's will, I think I would have some cute grand babies from the two of them.  It is funny because she has even talked about children with him to me.  I love having this relationship with her.  It is definitely a good thing.

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5 comments:

  1. Count with my prayers from the other side of Atlantic.

    Mathew might've turned away from God but what's really important is that God Didn't Turn away from him and keeps him as an Angel working and living among Angels.

    Blessings to all of you, Dear Friend,
    Teresa

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  2. What a beautiful post. So glad he has gotten this far - you should def be proud. :)

    Poor girl. Sending prayers.

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  3. They are a darling couple! I will be praying for Hannah.

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  4. I am so proud of YOU. It took great strength to do what you did and you did for the absolute right reason, your children. That makes me smile. Matthew sounds like a wonderful young man. You should be so proud and Hannah sounds perfect for him. I will be keeping all of you in my prayers and praying extra hard for Hannah. - Hugs from Idaho Miss Jolene. :)

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    1. Thanks Mimi. I plan to tell my story about my dark days because I know I am not alone and maybe I will be able to comfort or support others going through it. However, I am waiting to post it. It has a lot of negative things about my Dad and right now, I just do not feel right telling the world about his bad side since he has changed and doing so poorly.

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