Tuesday, December 16, 2014

All Things Must Pass


2014 has been a rough one for me and it looks like December is going out with a bang.  I can say, Noah is putting forth effort and is making good choices right now.  I think he has seen how the stress has physically taken a toll on my. My body is literally ill from it all. I have never been this sick.  I barely have any energy. They have diagnosed me with Whooping Cough but are now checking to see if I have heart problems too.  My feet and ankles are swelling.  My hands are retaining fluid. I have gained 12 pounds in one week from fluid retention.  Yesterday was incredibly tough.  I lost my uncle in a house fire.  The toughest part is knowing he was literally on fire and his daughters, my cousins saw this with their own eyes. They are only 18 and 17.  They tried to save him but could not. He has only one leg and gets around in a wheelchair.  They tried their hardest to carry him out but the fire was too bad, they had to leave him. He did manage to crawl some but fell short of the front door by 5 feet. Those poor girls living with this image. They have been telling everyone they are sorry, they tried. My heart is so deeply aching for them.  I know how it feels to lose your father but not like this and to feel guilty.  They lost everything, their home and their father. Their mother is not in the picture. Here is the news report if interested.  Please say prayers for my cousins.

I feel so helpless...

My oldest called crying tonight. I wish I could protect his heart.  He is such a wonderful young man and deserves someone to treat him right.  My heart hurts for him too.

I feel so helpless...

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6 comments:

  1. It seems too much to bare but I think you're - like they say - reaching the end of the rope... so Hang On.
    Sending you a Warm Hug,
    Teresa

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  2. I am so sorry that you are not well. Whooping cough is dangerous, BTW…..take care of yourself, and stay away from young children!

    (((hugs))),
    RJ

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  3. Oh, sweet Jolene. I'm so sorry about all this. Keep me posted on your health problems. And I'm also sorry about your uncle. How awful for his girls. I sure hope 2015 is better.

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  4. Hi Jolene, I'm keeping you in my prayers. I hope you are doing better as this post was written last week. hope you have a happy Christmas with your little grandson.

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  5. Dear Jolene such tragedy should never happen, I am so so sorry for those poor darlings who tried so hard to save their dad... their pain is magnified by seeing him like that... but it will fade, although the rawness never does completely leave one.... I do hope that the next year is going to be a much much better one for all your family... and that you also get over this infection whooping cough... another nasty to deal with, no wonder you feel no energy!! WE all shall pray for you to get better and those girls to feel peace finally... thinking of you and sending a million hugs, Janzi from across the pond**

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  6. Here's hoping 2015 is a better year Jolene. You have such a sweet heart. I'm praying for you- less stress and heartache, more good things.

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