Dear Teenage Jolene,
I know you are thinking WHAT? receiving this letter from yourself over 30 years in the future but I have some important words to share with you. Words you need to hear/read. Words I wish you really felt because guess what you do deserve to feel this way.
You need to stop trying so hard to make people like you because guess what? They do! You have no idea right now how many people really like you and think you are great. You just need to keep being you. You are honest and caring. You treat people with so much respect and care for their needs except for one person. This person is very important and you need to stop neglecting her. This person is you! You need to slow down and take some time for you. Honestly, it is not selfish at all. It is being a better person because you have to take care of yourself.
I know life is hard at times and you wish things were different. Well, if you could love yourself, your life will be a little different because you would have more confidence to try things you never had the courage and later wish you did. You work a lot of hours, too many hours while in high school. You need to enjoy these years, go out with your friends a little more.
You are such a strong individual, yeah you! I know right now you think you are so weak because of everything life is throwing at you. You think your Dad does not love you but oh, sweetie you are so wrong. He is lost. He has his priorities all wrong but he does love you. Protect your heart like you have. The past four years of your current life, you will see how much your Dad really does love you. Do not ever give up on him. Document all the good memories you have with him as a child, do not hang on to the bad ones.
You may be asking for tips as to who to avoid to have a better life or what you should do to avoid making mistakes in your life. Well, I am not going to tell you that because everything you have to go through will make you stronger. Every heart break you have is an experience you will learn from. I cannot believe how strong you really are. You just need to be happy with yourself too. Care for yourself. Listen to your Mother, when she tells you not to sit on your knees or cross them because you can do damage to your knees, because she is right it will definitely add to knee issues in your future.
Oh, and you do not have to diet. You are perfect the way you are. Oh sweetie, if you could see what I see now. I look at pictures of you and girl YOU ARE NOT FAT stop thinking that! You can be active but do not diet. One day in the future you will have side effect from medication where you will gain a lot of weight. If you take care of yourself as a teenager now and your young adult life, you will have less difficulties on losing that weight.
I know life a lot seems hopeless to you, but you have so much to give everyone including yourself. Yes, you do find happiness. At the age of 38, you will find your soulmate and life will be so much easier for you. Yes, you will have difficult roads but it will be easier because you will have his support. It is the love of your life you are wishing for now. He is your Prince Charming. Think on this Jolene, the fairytales you have read, they all have the individual going through tough times and in the end finding happiness and living happily ever after. If the character did not have something going on in life to learn from, how will she/he know what happiness is? See, this is why I cannot tell you to avoid Mr so and so because you need to meet Mr so and so because they teach you something and are part of the threads weaving to make you such a strong person. Just remember, you do not deserve to be abused. You are stronger than you think, you do not have to put up with that. You will have four sons who bring you such joy in your life. You will have two step daughters who are beautiful young women too and wait until you become a Grandma, you will experience all the joys of your children growing up again and the love from a grandchild is so special. You get to have all the love and fun and not have to be the parent.
I guess, the most important thing I want to tell you is love yourself, take time for you too, and stop trying so hard to make everyone like you. You cannot make everyone like you but those who do, well they are the important people and they think you are amazing. I think you are amazing so amazing I sung this song to you. Yes, you! The artist does a better job than you and her name is Colbie Caillat she has such a sweet style and you love her songs. This song is titled "Try" listen to the words sweetie.
All My Love,
Jolene from 2015