Sunday, June 21, 2015

My Father's Day Post

Here is it Father's Day.  Last year it was a horrible day.  I tried to avoid the social media because it was such a hard day.  I wanted to crawl into bed and just sleep the day away.  It was such a rough day being a little more than two months after my Dad passed and one month have Christian's first suicide attempt.  It took every ounce of me not to stay in bed because Todd deserved to be celebrated.  He is such a wonderful man and has been so good to me, my children, his children, and our grandson.


This year Father's Day is different.  I am sad I cannot hug or kiss my Dad any time I want.  I do miss him, but it is not the same as last year.  I truly found peace and acceptance after Hamilton's Living Tribute Dedication.  I will always miss him but he is with me still.  He sends a cardinal often to visit.  On Ethan's graduation day, that night I was thinking about the day and how I wished my Dad was there because I know he wanted to be there, then I heard "Cheer, Cheer." I looked up and out my window was a cardinal bird sitting on a branch looking right at me.  I smiled, chuckled, and said, "Thank you Dad."  As soon as I said that the bird flew away.


I know my Dad is enjoying himself in heaven.  I know he is with his Dad and his grandson as well as his grandparents.  I know he is not suffering in pain or sorrow any more and this I find peace with.  I know he did not want any one of his daughters or family to mourn over his death.  I know one day, I will get to see him again and kiss him.  No matter what I will always miss him but I am now focusing on his love.  His love for each of us and the fond memories I have with him. 

I love you Dad and Happy Father's Day. 

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1 comment:

  1. I'm glad this Father's Day was a little easier for you than last year's, Jolene! Stay strong, friend!

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