Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Cruddy Day!

It was a very cold day.
I am not just talking about the weather.

I was excited going into work.
I knew today was my last day for this week.
I would be enjoying the next 5 days off.

My co-worker/friend and I wondered
Where 's one of our supervisor.
She is the one supervisor out of all of them
That I know goes to bat for us.
She is the one that has been siding for me lately.
She is the one that I can trust.
She is also the one that has been
helping me try to get into another department.

Our other supervisor was out yesterday sick
So we started to think the same
about the one we were questioning.

I spoke to Ryan letting him know
I was working on information to give him
about my clients since he is my back up
while I am out the next two days.
He could also represent my groups
at our meeting on Thursday.

About 20 minutes after talking to Ryan
I heard my supervisor that was in and
my manager in the other supervisor's cubicle.
Hmmm...that is not normal.

Of course I get a call 2 minutes
before I was to go to lunch.
Exactly when my phone rang
My manager came over and told
my friend to log off the phone for a quick stand up.

Unannounced stand ups are
typically not a good thing.
She came back.
I'm still on the phone.
She looked shocked.

I mouthed was it about our supervisor?
She shook her head yes.

I was finishing my call and
4 of my co-workers
1 supervisor and
1 manager just stood waiting
waiting for me to get off the phone.

My manager had red eyes from crying.
Mood was definitely not good.
I finished my call then it hit...

We knew it was coming...

We lost 4 in our department
4 in St Louis.
My supervisor that I was questioning
She was one.
Ryan was one.
and two other women that I enjoy working with.

I started to cry. supervisor.
The only one I thought was on my side.
I felt bad for the other too but
Dawn has been there for 13 years
the other supervisor was promoted
just 6 months ago.

I can not figure out how they picked who left.
I think this is our first round as well.

Later I found out others were let go
Others in marketing.
St Louis lost 4 marketing people.
Our Davenport office of 7 was totally shut down.

I feel sick.
I could not even eat lunch.
I feel like I lost something.
I feel numb.
I want my Dawn back.
Yes, she made me mad from time to time
but that is normal.
I always knew she was there for me.

I feel like someone died.
I feel like I am mourning. not deserving to have a Woo Hoo day for sure.
I posted that too soon.


  1. I am so incredibly sorry for your loss and for your future worry. I know that this is one of those situations where one thing generally leads to another. How horrible for you.

    However, as bad as this all was, your Woo-Hoos were good. Those are all wonderful things. They remain wonderful despite the bitter.

    So we have the bitter, so we can taste the sweet. I just hope this "downsizing" doesn't end up stressing you to the max as you take on the jobs of all who left.

    Good luck. Enjoy your "next" Christmas (you're kinda like a Hobbit).

  2. I am so sorry! I wish there was something more I could say, but I know there's not. {{{hugs}}}


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