Friday, February 28, 2014

Quiet But Here

I have to confess I have been quiet on my blog this week.  
I have been following my favorites and reading but I am sorry I have not commented.
It has been a very tough week.
The boys (my younger two) have been fighting a lot.
Fist fighting.
End of one trimester and once again not thrilled with their grades.
At least one improved his failing, the other did not.

My Dad has been calling me.
Normally I call him.
He keeps repeating the same thing to me.
I think he is trying to tell me Good-bye in his own way.
He is tired and wants to quit.
He is tired of waiting.
He has no energy.
I can hear him struggling with each word.
He shared his worries with me.
He wants to me follow through and keep after my two sisters who abuse drugs.
As well as one of my nephews.
He does not want them to end up like him.
He is getting crankier.
He is trying to start fights at times.
I just do not give in when he tries.
I look past it and just smooth it over.
He is getting things confused so easily.
His birthday is towards the end of March.
Am I horrible for saying I do not want him to make it to his birthday?

I just do not want him to suffer any more.
I want him to be at peace.
If he wants to give up because he is ready,
Then I am ready to let him go too.
I will miss him.
I know he will miss us.
He told me so.
I just do not want to see him suffer any more.
It has been a rough week.
Please forgive me for not posting or commenting.
I am here.


1 comment:

  1. Oh Jolene! It sounds like you have your plate full! I hope things get better for you! Hang in there.


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