So you want to know more about me, well pull up a chair and read away. I am the first born to my parents on December 27th. My Father was in the hospital as a patient his self at the time of my birth, he was in a coma. He didn't realize I was around until after the birth of my sister Lisa. She was born on my first birthday.
Lisa and I were very close yet we were so different from one another. I was all girl and she was such a tom boy. I remember there were times she seemed to be so mean, breaking my favorite toys just to get back at me. I would teach her anything I just learned and she would protect me, not letting anyone cross me. I recall once, she beat up a boy because he pushed me at recess, the poor kid didn't even know what was coming for him. Lisa and I chose different ways to deal with issues that were going on at home, me I chose to lose myself in music, either listening to albums or playing the piano. She chose to start to drink in 6th grade and use drugs by 7th grade. Lisa was my first best friend and also my first playmate. We always had a special bond with one another.
It was in 3rd grade I got the one thing I have wanted for years for Christmas, a piano. I took lessons from 3rd grade through 10th grade when my parents divorced one another. It was too much for my Mom, so I ended up buying my own sheet music and teaching myself current music. I always had such stage fright and couldn't play when others were listening, except for my family. Christmas time was my favorite, all the Christmas Carols.
When I was 11 years old my sister Amy entered our family. Oh, how my Father adored her, for a long time he was sober and was not abusive to us. It was shortly after she was born when Lisa at the age of 10 and myself would have to make dinner, Monday through Friday. We had to have the meal nearly completed when our parents came home. Our Father was impatient and didn't want to wait for our Mother to breast feed Amy, so we cooked. My Mother thought that this was an excellent idea so we could learn how to cook. When she was 13 years old, her Mother died and she married my Father at the age of 16 not knowing how to cook anything but macaroni and cheese. While Amy was a toddler, I got my first camera. I remember dressing her up and having her model for me outdoors and I would snap away. I loved taking pictures but couldn't afford to develop all the film I was using.
When I was 13 years old my sister Katie was born. She was sickly at first and I loved her so much. My sister Lisa, would "hog" Amy all the time, so this baby was going to be "mine". I would hold her whenever it was possible. Katie would called me "Mom" first and I loved that, although thinking about it now, I am sure that may have hurt my Mom some. I spoiled both Amy and Katie but had a special relationship with Katie until I started my family. She was 2 when our parents divorced. When I went away to college she was just beginning Kindergarten, she would call me at school to tell me "Mom won't let me do this or that.", as if I were her parent and could over rule what Mom said.
While in school, I tried to be the good kid. Lisa and my Father were giving my Mother enough grief. I had such low self esteem and wanted everyone approval that I didn't stay with anyone "click" of kids. I was what you could say a floater. I was friends with everyone. I would do things with each type of label of kids that there was at that time. My friends would respect my choice and never made me feel that I had to drink or try drugs. I am grateful that they all respected me. I had a few teachers that made an impact on me. Starting with 6th grade, my first male teacher. Oh, how I loved his poetry unit. It was then I started to love to write poetry. My art teacher in junior high, she made art fun and she taught us more at a high school level, teaching the history with what we were working on. We had to write reports for her as well regarding certain artist and art eras. She taught my oldest when he was a Freshman in high school. She even remembered me, that made me feel great. My 7th and 8th grade teacher, I liked a lot, however, I was his favorite and I could get away with a little more then the other students. In high school I had a few. Both of my biology teachers made such an impact on me. 1st semester was a younger teacher, when it came time for him to teach evolution, I didn't pay attention. I took out my math book and started to work on my homework. He held me over after class and asked me why I did that. I never gave him any problems before. I just looked at him and mentioned that I didn't believe in evolution and I felt that if he was going to teach evolution then he should be teaching creation as well. He explained how he couldn't do that, and I explained how I couldn't study something I didn't believe in. He managed to tell me that was fine as long as I didn't disturb the class and I didn't. When it came time for the test in that chapter, he mentioned to the rest of the class that the evolution section was optional. I gained so much respect for this teacher, more respect then I ever had for any teacher. He could have forced me, but he respected my belief and I think the fact that I didn't cause any problems also helped. The next semester I had a different biology teacher, I loved his sense of humor and the fact that we had to draw what we dissected I loved. I loved drawing. The last high school teacher that made an impact on me was not a popular at all with the other students. She was tough on us and I had her for a couple of classes. One was a college prep class in Writing. We had to write in a journal. I really didn't think she read them until one day, she made a note in mine regarding my writings about Paul McCartney. After Spring Break, I found a post card in my journal, it was of The Beatles. She asked if I would take care of it because it came from a special shop in California, I still have that post card. I went to college wanting to be a teacher to make an impact on children just as the teachers had for me. I earned an elementary education degree but have never taught other then substituting. I met the boys' Father at college. I was married to him for 15 years and the best thing out of that marriage was my 4 beautiful boys; Matthew, Joshua, Ethan, and Noah. Once again self esteem beaten to the ground, I moved out with the boys, we deserved better.
2005 I met my now husband on the Internet. We made an instant connection. I think one just knows when it is meant to be. Four months after meeting him, I found a job in the same city he was and moved my boys 2 hours away from the only city they knew and my hometown. We lived with Todd and his 2 daughters. After 2 years of living with one another, he proposed to me, but we waited a year to set the date. We didn't have a Brady Bunch blending, after 2 years we still had problems, but it was getting better. By the time we set the date, the kids were all "it's about time" and excited for us. Life is a challenge at times, I'm not going to say it's a piece of cake, but we all realize how much better our lives are, how much happier the parents are.
I chose to start this blog to have a way to outlet memories, stories of what is going on in my life, photos and poetry. I have been blogging here and there but never one place specifically. I also had written in journals from time to time. I wanted something that would be here forever for my children to be able to reflect back on. I have shared one of my friend's blog site and was asked to make a section of recipes for them to follow, so sometime in the future I will add that. Don't expect a lot of recipes, only those that I know my children would like and enjoy. I don't spend a lot of time cooking from recipes(different recipes) because, well let's face it with 6 children cooking for 8 can be challenging. I might do more when our family size gets smaller (more on a regular basis instead of special occasions.)
Friends mean everything to me as well as family. I am a kind heart woman who will do anything I can for friends and family. I am still trying to get everyone approval. I know I can't have it, but it bothers me when I don't get it. Something I need to work on. I enjoy life now and I am not materialistic but I do appreciate what I have. In short, I am a daughter, a big sister, a mother, a wife, an aunt, and a friend who enjoys reflecting on things, poetry, photos, enjoying life,and art. These are the important things in life...that and God.
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